


hostile

by asexuelf



Series: Emotions Challenge [2]
Category: Dragon Age II
Genre: Butterflies, Crushes, Drabble, Fluff, Genderfluid Anders (Dragon Age), Genderqueer, Genderqueer Fenris (Dragon Age), Neopronouns, Nonbinary Hawke (Dragon Age), Other, Pre-Relationship, Trans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-15
Updated: 2019-09-15
Packaged: 2020-10-19 11:03:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 811
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20656178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asexuelf/pseuds/asexuelf
Summary: Anders has never seen Fenris smile.





	hostile

**Author's Note:**

> between my ocd and my bpd both flaring up horribly this last week, i needed a pick me up to focus on. so, a fluffy lil dooble!
> 
> if you hate nonbinary people, don't read this. for both our sakes.
> 
> fenris' pronouns are ne/nym/nyr  
anders' pronouns are she/her & he/him  
hawke's pronouns are they/them  
(isabela uses her canon she/her!)

Anders hadn't realized that every time he's seen Fenris, ne's ready for battle. Hard brows, harder armor, clawed hands always ready to tear or cut… Those wide eyes were narrow when Anders saw them, always on alert, always looking for an enemy. 

It makes sense, he supposes. They really only see each other when Hawke decides they both need to come along for some noble quest or another - if killing for coin could ever be noble. Of course ne isn't going to be bright-eyed and smiling at Anders when they're out killing slavers and freeing mages. Even Anders is having a harder time with being bright-eyed and smiley than in his younger days; and those days had been cynicism more than actual happiness.

So it makes sense that Fenris was perhaps even more hostile than usual when Anders tried to tease nym or bring nym into good humor. Fenris was _ busy _ . Fenris was trying to protect them. Fenris was doing them all the good favor - nymself the good favor - of keeping the party alive and what did the _ abomination _ have to say but thinly-veiled insults and empty flirtations? Nothing.

Right now, however, Fenris isn't trying to protect anybody. Ne is surrounded by a flurry of blue morpho butterflies, their wings as rich as the sea. A huge, fluttering mass of them are making their way through Sundermount, filling the sky with color and the awed laughter of his compatriots.

Isabela looks like she wants to throw her arms up into the air as she might with cool ocean spray, but she doesn't want to disturb the butterflies, not on their harsh trek either to or from Antiva. So she clutches her hands to her chest and watches nature's spectacle with sparkling brown eyes.

Hawke is much the same, though with much less shock. Something about their face is wistful, their eyes shiny and half-lidded. Anders feels similarly. 

Anders remembers the way huge swarms of butterflies would migrate past the tower, mages swarming themselves around the small windows before Templars shooed them to their "proper" tasks. And before that, she remembers festivals in her village, her mother holding her close as they watched bright orange monarchs or peacock butterflies with the rest of their neighbors.

Did Hawke have similar memories? Were they thinking of a warm hand on their shoulder, a man with their face smiling down at them? Perhaps two toddlers on their lap when there is now only one distant adult? But Anders leaves it alone, because Hawke is smiling.

They aren't smiling as broadly or as brightly as Fenris, however.

The expression on nyr face is breathtaking. Anders has to stop and stare for a moment, mouth hanging open in shock, old memories suddenly dissolving from her thoughts. She doesn't remember ever seeing nym smile before, even those rare times when ne would joke with Isabela or Varric, but here ne is, blossoming open like a flower to sunlight. Fenris has never been so _ bright_.

Nyr arms are at nyr side, but nyr palms are open, reaching for the bright blue creatures passing by without conscious thought. A couple of butterflies land on nyr gauntlets, fluttering gently on their silver perch before flying off again, completely unnoticed by the elf they'd sat on.

Those green eyes are open wide with wonder now. Nothing skeptical or dangerous touches a single line of Fenris' face. Just joy. Simple, honest joy.

When a single blue morpho lands on nyr nose, ne lets out a surprised laugh, low and unpracticed and, to Anders, unquestionably beautiful.

Anders wants that smile directed at her. She wants to make that laugh sound through every part of Kirkwall, of the entire Marches, of the whole of Thedas. She wants nym to know that ne is never in danger while she is near. She wants nym to know that ne is never vulnerable, but that ne can be. That she wants nym to be.

Anders can only imagine the kind of row _ that _ would cause. Fenris wouldn't pull out her heart, but it would be a close thing.

The butterflies pass and the party moves onward through Sundermount. They're all a little quiet, still touched by nature's display. Isabela gently laments the beauty of butterflies, Hawke alongside her, talking about how they'd explain it to Merrill, how Varric would have loved to have watched and written it down, but Fenris remains silent. Ne doesn't close off or grow stern-faced however, not yet. Those eyes are still a little wider, face a little softer, mouth a gentle line curving nearly imperceptibly towards the sky. 

Anders turns to nym and asks if ne's ever seen something like that before in nyr travels. Ne answers an honest, awe-struck 'no', nyr voice more gentle than has ever been directed towards Anders.

Anders hopes they don't find the enemy Hawke is looking for.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading!
> 
> if you hate nonbinary people, don't comment about it. thank you.


End file.
